Fly high
01042010
HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY
How I wish today was a joke too :)
So fly high, come to the sky
When I’m gone, it’d be like I never was there at all. The world would never know of my existence. Nobody would acknowledge the fact that I survived – that I was once with them.
I think I’m becoming real rebellious. Suddenly I don’t care about my grades, homework, CCAs… In other words, I fogot about school, I forgot about my main priorities.
I fall asleep in school everyday. I can barely stay awake, even with the help of sweets, much less pay any attention to the lessons I take. I have no idea where we’re on in Geography and Science.
And guess what? I’m practically flunking all my tests.
Never mind. I know that I won’t give up. After working hard for so long…
But still. I don’t have any motivation to do anything to help myself. But I must! This is a race against time. There’s only about 27 days left. If I don’t start trying now…
I haven’t put in effort for so long. I’ve become rusty. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what hard work is like. What is it like? What’s the definition of ‘diligence’?
This sucks. I don’t know what to do.
I want to work hard. I do.
But I don’t know where to start from. How can person, so lost, start from nowhere? How can a person, on a one-man island, find a way to survive?
It’d be difficult. But along with the souls living within me, I’d do it. It’s not only to do with what I want, it’s a matter of what I must do.
Also… Will be spending lots of cold, hard cash on SHINee fan goods because since there’s no albums in Singapore of theirs for me to buy. I wish someone will sell their previous mini-albums and album. It’s so frustrating!! I see previous albums of SNSD, 2PM, etc, but none of SHINee.
Okay actually I can understand that it’s all sold out when people see them in stores. But still.
NEVER MIND I’D CONCENTRATE ALL MY FAN GOODS AND MY STUDIES.
With every breath I take, every tick of the clock I hear
It feels as if my life, my time is running out
Slipping through my fingers, unstoppable
You cannot feel the pain without being a solid person. But the soul and heart remembers.
I think 2PM not bad heehee. I feel like buying their 2PM Special Edition Polaroids. So cool! And maybe their ‘Kiss me’ mug as well. 8D Oh and U-Kiss’ 1st album. And maybe CNBlue’s… I WANT A LOT OF THINGS D:
Okay anyway so many birthdays are coming up. I started thinking about mine as well. ._.
I shall make a list~ :X I know most of them are not realistic but well whatever.
- Polaroid camera (pink) with Doraemon film
- Camera (red/pink) with damn good zoom effects :D
- Bag I saw from Levi’s/Cubez/Zinc
- Clothes ^^
- SHINee 1st Mini-album
- SHINee 2nd Mini-album: Romeo
- SHINee 1st Album: A.Mi.Go (repackaged)
- SHINee Photobook: Day (with poster)
- SHINee Photobook: Night
- SHINee Lightstick (both versions)
- SHINee fan goods
- CLRDE.n clothes
- SHINee accessories
- SHINee Nanas’ B set
- Mixstyle headphones (pink and black)
- Go to Seoul, South Korea If I go Korea, everything I want would be bought there 8D All those SHINee albums, calendar, photobooks, posters, fan goods, accessories, magazines, SHINee endorsed Ottogi snacks, SHINee endorsed CLRIDE.n clothes, SHINee endorsed Nanas’ B cream, radii shoes, Banc and Colonize stuff… OMG YAY. And it’d be cheaper as well.
But as my mum said, “What about the price of the tickets to Korea?”
Okay good point. ):
I hope everything I want would be struck out though. Then I think I’d really be happy? O_O Heeheeee :D
Can you hear my heart breaking into a thousand pieces? I can’t hear it. But I am able to feel it cracking. The pieces pierce into my skin and they stay there. The pain… It’s driving me insane.
Hello, don’t play with my head. Thanks.
Why did the sky cry along with me?
Perhaps I am really that mighty. As I thought about sad things when walking home today after school, I could feel the raindrops on me. Falling slowly. I looked down and thought, “The sky is crying, and it’s crying for me.”
If you believe
I want an answer. Your answer would mean so much to me. It would change everything – it would change me. I want to be changed. I want to feel like a person with a heart again.
Just tell me. I’d rather you kill all my hopes than leave me hanging there without an answer. I don’t care about the hurt or disappointment. It can make me stronger :) I just want to know.
An answer, please.
